Last night as the US election results were broadcast, I kept looking at the faces of the old...and especially the young. I watched Rev Jessie Jackson cry. Amazing to think that this man who stood on the steps of the Lincoln monument and listened to Martin Luther King Jr deliver the "I Have a Dream" speech would just 40 some odd years later witness the election of the 1st African-American president.
But as awe-inspiring as that thought was it was the faces of the young children that brought tears to my eyes. There was this couple in Virginia that the BBC interviewed...and they had this son of about 10 who kept chanting "Yes, we can." I thought no matter what else this night does it offers hope to our minority children...in the US, the UK and around the world. Instead of aspiring to be rappers or basketball players, some will now be inspired to be president...or Prime Minister.
The message that Barack Obama's election as President sends is clear. To all our children struggling to rise above the poverty into which they were born through no fault of their own...Yes, You Can. To all of our children of coloured who once found safety in gangs and dreamt no higher than rapper or basketball player...Yes, You Can. To all those children who come from broken homes...Yes, You Can. To all those children and young people who struggle to find their identity and to build upon their heritage...Yes, You Can.
But if this is a new day for our children, it must begin with us...the trusted adults in their world: parents, grandparents, teachers, and mentors. It is our responsibility to seize for our children this new hope and spirit of Yes, You Can. So how then do we do that?
1) Talk to your child. Children are amazingly intelligent and aware little people...corporate America realises this with its billions invested in advertising targeting this demographic. We too need to realise it. Rather than assuming that something is an adult subject, we must engage them in a dialogue that will disciple and challenge their forming opinions...and our own. My challenge to you is...bring back the family dinner of old. Sit down to eat as a family, turn off the TV, talk about not only your day and what is happening in everyone's live, but talk too about the challenges we face as a global community: the environment, racism/classiest, the economy.
2) Listen to your child. It is not enough to simply talk, but you must listen...with an open mind and heart. Sometimes what you hear may not be what you want to. You may learn of bullying...or stereotyping...or teen pregnancy, gangs and drugs. But by truly listening to what is happening in your child's world, you have positioned yourself to make a difference in that world. If you build a bond of trust and mutual respect then it will be you to whom your child turns when faced with a moral or ethical dilemma.
3) Feed minds. Your child's...yes, but just as importantly...your own. Do you have a library card? When was the last time your child saw you read a newspaper? Do you have an unfulfilled dream of your own? Is now the time to model success to your child by resurrecting that dream? My 20 year old daughter still feels that one of the happiest moments of her life was watching me walk across the stage to receive my college degree when she was 8.
4) Feed their bodies. There is a computer programming jargon...Junk in, junk out. As a childbirth educator and breastfeeding counsellor, I cannot emphasis enough how important diet is to maximising our children's potential. From conception, the things that we take into our bodies have powerful impacts upon their mental capabilities. Eat a balanced diet (yes, you can...have some goodies...but after the good stuff). Avoid drugs, alcohol and cigarettes. And breastfeed. Studies have shown that breastfed children score an average of six points higher on standard IQ tests. Not to say that our kids cannot have some junk...even Angelina Jolie was caught on film enjoying Cheeto's with her children. But no child can achieve well in school on a breakfast of potato chips/crisps and soda.
5) First things first. Set your priorities...make your children number 1. We give our children gadgets and designer clothes, but studies show that one of the biggest influences upon college attendance is having a computer in the home. Perhaps it means sacrificing other things, but this one purchase will most significantly impact your child's education and potential. But even in this...remember your child needs YOU above all else. Many families must have two incomes to survive, but the truth is that this leaves our children vulnerable to other influence: peer pressure, gangs, sexual promiscuity and drugs. Explore your options: is it possible to find options that might allow you to work from home or a more flexible schedule. What about your support network? Barack Obama illustrates well the value of extended family...crediting much of his success to the grandparents that helped to raise him. And if you must work, take the time to monitor your children in your absence...mobile phones, neighbours and community groups can help you to make sure that your values are still important.
This is truly a wondrous time for not only the US but the world, especially our children. Barack Obama has shown that skinny, black boys with funny names...can become the leader of the free world. But it is up to us to make sure this moment in history does not go uncaptured. Our chant must become...Yes, We Must. Yes, I Must. Our children and our future are counting upon us. The change begins with each mother, father, grandparent and teacher.
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